So im Jonny. Heres my life so far in short and description of what happened when i left home.
I left Scotland for a while last year in July. I wanted to walk away from the last 18 years, to make a new start i guess i should say.
I wasnt really in any position to motivate myself to do anything interesting with my life up to that point. Still dont really know what to do with it, i wanted some space. I decided all the things id experienced up to that point just werent making the cut, the typical testimony story lifes a bitch nothings enough for me, whats the point....? exactley? I knew there was truth in my church and what my mum and her folks beleived. I was brought up Christian but i walked away from the church because it bored me completely, id only tune in really when i needed something or when there would be a move of the spirit and people would get physcially healed or fall over tripping out on holy ghost. Id seen spiritual things happen all throughout my life answers to prayer, healings, people speaking prophetically which is when someone tells you something about yourself that theres no possible way of them knowing, your past, your worries. stuff that needs to come out it order for you to get over it. So im convinced. Theres got to be something else to this world, another realm a being overall, something. So thats me im a Christian, when it suits me.
I enrolled myself into a Discipleship school in a small town called oxford in New Zealand. It had some great speakers. People who have lived what they beleived for 30, 40 years. The school is split up into two parts "Lecture Phase", the speakers lead a week each on whatever topic. It lasts 12 weeks. The seccond part "Outreach" we flew to Indonesia and helped out over there.The school is basically a retreat for christians to learn more about christianity. I felt a bit unsure about what the other students were gona be like, hardcore, heavy christians. Id never even finished the bible. What i found out when i got there was that the people at the school mostly had the same stories as me, burnt out, fed up, confused. Great im not the only one. Now the reason that sealed the deal for me going, the school was snowboard themed. My plans after school were go to france or somewhere with snow and snowboard for a season then come back and then go to uni or something. Stoked i did this school first.
What happened in that school is i learnt what they had to say about Christianity different angles from the different speakers, i had plenty of time to work out my own theology, not to say i pick and chose what i like about christianity cos i dont, i used to but not anymore, what i beleive now is whats written in the Bible, what interpretation i chose is up to whatever God wants to reveal to me. Thats the theolgy i create. Thats my values and what i understand.
Going back into my past, around the age of 12 i made a decision to follow Christ.. At the age of 12 i have no idea what that means. It felt right of course im brought up Christian. I think theres a reason i made that decision even if i didnt fully understand it, mabye things could have gone differently for me and i would have matured and understood more about that commitment earlier. Either way i gave something to God that day and Hes watched me go through crap and led me out the other side into where i am now. So I decided to get baptised, a commitment i understand a bit clearer. I beleive on that day something else happened inside me. I am a Christian, now i feel i understand more about what it means. I dont beleive in religion, after all it was the religious leaders that killed jesus. I dont beleive in rules and laws as a means of approval from God. No i beleive that we are complete and total sinners and always falI short of what God intended us to be like. I believe that by keeping laws and rules im only fooling myself by thnking im impressing God. No im a sinner, a fallen creature struggling with the curse of sin. The fact that jesus died to break that curse on my life even though were wretched messes, is something worth thinking about!! I believe i am free to live however i want, by beleiving Jesus died for my sins the curse of sin is broken. So i will try to live with God as my main focus, if he is my focus then im addicted to him and not to stuff that deteriorates us and causes hurt.. THIS IS THE ESSENCE OF THE BIBLE THE ESSENCE! " DO TO OTHERS WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE THEM TO DO TO YOU". Thats it... not convert the whole world into christians, not kill homos (what difference have they to us... we both struggle with the curse of sin to be gay is the same as to telI a lie... does it shock you.. were all a mess.) I believe that i will only understand who i am if i can at least understand where i came from. What it is im here for? i beleive theres a reason, and i can say im at a better place to look into the future now, with hope for something better.
Thanks be to God, Ahmen.
